Expressions that cannot be describe by others.

So,i'm gonna have an interview in another 7 hours time.Y i'm not asleep...i dunno...but all i cant think of is valentines day is coming,and its not gonna be as crowded as ever.Most of my frens has their partners while i'm still single n not get over with by him....but....i guess life is juz nvr fair....but i could nvr think he really got over me so fast.....i guess its bck to me alone..i feel lonely already....

I hope 'U' All Understand

The last i ever touch this thing was when i wanted to start over my life again.Turns out,the new life juz went backwords.I cannot describe my life in words anymore.The more i grow the more burden n fears keeps appearing n i tend to run.The world has open my eyes and the truth is,there r no miracles and fairy stories.Love comes n goes n leaves a scar especially when its the one u can nvr 4get.frens comes and stay but not many hardly stick by ur side for long.I;m jobless now,i hv not income coming in.i hv fewer frens n i hv no connections with my family,n i lost the my way to anything.I dont plan to start another new life bcuz i knoe very well it juz will bckfire agn instead i will go on but i wan to shut down from every1.I do plan to get a nite job but i hvnt landed in one yet.
The last thing that 'he' said tat stayed in my mind n heart since tat day he said it was 'i love you bit i cant get into a relationship bcuz i dont hv faith in myself.'
I accept it bcuz neither do i hv enug faith for my own life.i barely cannot stand a day without him,its misery but i hv to.i dont know y but he can nvr seem to noe or understand me.
Everyhting happens for a reason but i think my life happens for no reason.i juz think i'm a waste to everybody's time.nobody cares if i did die or anything.i might juz be less of a burden if i disappeared.
My exsistance to him,frens , family and others r juz ntg n a waste of time.i'm juz a burden n an easily forgotten person.i can nvr be an important role in anything or in anyones life.